Oct 17, 2009

A LITTLE SATURDAY SILLINESS


Believe it or not ;
These are Memphis , TN 's
REAL 911 Calls!

Dispatcher : 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
Caller: I heard what sounded like gunshots coming from the brown house on the corner.
Dispatcher: Do you have an address?
Caller:  No, I have on a blouse and slacks, why?

*******************
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
Caller :  Someone broke into my house and took a bite out of my ham and cheese sandwich .
Dispatcher : Excuse me?
Caller :  I made a ham and cheese sandwich and left it on the kitchen table and when I came back from the bathroom, someone had taken a bite out of it.
Dispatcher : Was anything else taken?
Caller :  No, but this has happened to me before and I'm sick and tired of it!

********************
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is the nature of your emergency?
Caller:   I'm trying to reach nine eleven but my phone doesn't have an eleven on it.
Dispatcher: This is nine eleven.
Caller:    I thought you just said it was nine-one-one
Dispatcher: Yes, ma'am nine-one-one and nine-eleven are the same t hing.
Caller:    Honey, I may be old, but I'm not stupid.

********************
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What's the nature of your emergency?
Caller:    My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart
Dispatcher: Is this her first child?
Caller:    No, you idiot! This is her husband!

********************
Dispatcher: 9-1-1
Caller:  Yeah, I'm having trouble breathing. I'm all out of breath.  Darn....I think I'm going to pass out.
Dispatcher: Sir, where are you calling from?
Caller:   I'm at a pay phone. North and Foster.
Dispatcher: ! Sir, an ambulance is on the way. Are you an asthmatic?
Caller:   No
Dispatcher: What were you doing before you started having trouble breathing?
Caller:   Running from the Police

15 comments:

  1. Hilarious. Thanks for getting me giggling first thing in the morning. Have a great weekend.

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  2. I have had my first chuckle of the day, Lori! Only in America? LOL
    ~Ethel

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  3. I needed that smile you just put on my face. Thanks

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  4. WHat a great way to start the day! Thanks for sharing Lori.
    Hugz,
    Karen

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  5. Oh my goodness.... amazing! Some people should not be walking around without Keepers.
    Cass

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  6. How funny! Got some laughs from those!
    Brenda

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  7. You have to wonder sometimes how some people can walk and breathe at the same time.

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  8. Fuuunnn-NY!!!!
    I also enjoyed the fire insurance/Arson story!

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  9. Love these . . . and those "bloopers in the bulletins"! You can't make up real things -- great laugh!

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  10. Love it. I bet they are all true!

    xoxo
    Jane

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  11. Only in America. Sheesh!
    Gotta love the dude that was running from police. What a moron.

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  12. So nice to "meet" you! Thanks for coming by to visit my blog and for your very kind words. This was a very funny post. Can't wait to read more! Best wishes, NM.

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  13. "Is this her first child?" !! Hahahaha!

    ReplyDelete

Thank you for taking the time to leave a comment. I appreciate every one of them and respond to all.

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