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Oct 19, 2009

PONDERISMS

Can you cry under water?
How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
Why do you have to "put your two cents in"... but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?

Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.
Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural? 



Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat? 




If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons? 




Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune? 

Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

12 comments:

Gail said...

I must admit, I have never thought of these questions, nor do I have the answers.

MiMi said...

Okay, these are crazy, just like me! I love this list, really funny. I had one once about freeways and highways and on ramps/off ramps once, but now I can't remember it! Dangit.

Chari said...

Mornin' Girlfriend...

Hehe! Great post...but thanks to you...now I'll have the ABC song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star...in my head all day long!!!

Warmest wishes,
Chari
PS...left you a note on your Sunday Favorites post...thank you for joining in!!!

@eloh said...

I'd leave you a comment but I'm still pondering........

Joanne said...

LOL love those. As far as the burial one I hope so - I gave them my husband's favourite outfit to wear for eternity. White t-shirt and jeans - I know he would come back and haunt me if I put him in a suit.

Mary said...

Love the thought this provoked. I think that assassination is a political crime and that's what differentiates from murder. But who know :-).

Muddy Boot Dreams said...

Groan......I am going to be pondering all day now.

Jen

Beverly @ The Buzz said...

Here are a couple for you--

Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?

Why does 'comb' rhyme with 'dome', but 'dome' doesn't rhyme with 'come'?

And the biggest mystery of all--why do those chubby rolls of fat look so cute on a baby's thighs, but not so much on mine??

Lori E said...

Well we can all agree with Beverly's comment about the chubby baby thighs.

Sherri@lavenderfields said...

Hi Lori
Great sight you have here. The other day you informed me on my sight about your writers group in November. That sounds very interesting. Thanks for giving me a bit of time to figure out what my favourite movie is. I'll have to give it a bit of thought. Anyway I'll be sure to check back soon. And again thanks for the invite : ) Sherri

Haley said...

Ok, That was WAY TOO MANY food for thought. I have thought about some of these questions... though not all. You cracked me up! =P

Deb said...

good questions.....LOL

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